What The Men Tell All Told Me

Ok so last night I got together with my BFF (Bachelorette Fanatic Friend) Lauren to watch the Men Tell All. I was excited to see this show for two reasons! The first reason is that I love drama as long as it has nothing to do with me. The second reason is Michael. I have been missin his little breakdancing behind and I couldn't wait to see him again. So here is what I have come up with after watching last nights show:

1. Chris Harrison is freakin hilarious!!! He is a native Texan which is probably the main reason I love him but seriously he is really really funny. I was so impressed with the way he called the dudes out last night (I will get to why I am calling them dudes and not men or even guys later).My fave things he said last night were: "on a scale from zero to Mesnick, how did he do? AND  "Isn't being on the Bachelorette a violation of Man Code?  Cause you're all fishin in the same pool" Brilliant Chris!!!

2. Matheu totally got the hookup!!!! He just scored a free-party-your-ass-off trip to LA. That's right. Matheu the dude who was eliminated in episode 2 (I believe). The one in the cowboy hat......Yeah he was there last night. He said NOTHING but won the best prize.  Whats that you ask? A free trip to booze it up @ the after party and I am sure a wicked suite at some cool hotel in LA. I mean think about it. Who could ask for a better deal.

3. Juan may be a little metro but something has to be said for one of the few dudes this season who actually has manners. I loved the fact that he spoke up and asked what was so wrong with being respectful and courteous! Hats off to you Juan. I think your mama taught you right!

4. Oh my dear Jake! Where do I begin???? I totally commend him for doing what he did (if it was his decision and not the producers, which I am still not real sure of) I mean I really and truly think he cares for Jillian and was looking out for her best interest. That has to be applauded. I think there are tons of girls (and guys) out there who would kill to have a friend like Jake. Someone you know who always has your back! The confrontation with Sasha made me proud. Seriously did he drop the F-bomb? I was shocked. I didn't know that Jake even knew how to use that word in the correct content much less have the gonads to drop it on TV. But I was proud of him nonetheless. Now the woman in the audience that asked him about being the next Bachelor.....I would have bet my life savings (which isn't much mind you) that this topic was gonna come up somewhere in this two hour show. I know I might make a few enemies with what I am about to say but oh well. This is my blog right?!?!? OK here goes. If Jake is the next Bachelor how boring is that season really gonna be??? Now don't get me wrong I am a big Jake supporter. Cute Pilot from Texas who has an amazing body. Come on....I would be crazy not to be a fan. But in my opinion he is Jones'n way too hard for LOVE. And he isn't that interesting AT ALL. Now I do believe he will probably make some woman very very very happy but I just don't know that I could handle that mushy, gushy, gosh darn it, awww shucks persona for two months solid. If he did the whole season sans shirt.....now that might hold my attention.

5. Michael Stagliano! Now there is a Bachelor for ya :) I think he is A-dorable. I mean honestly does it get any cuter than that? And what he said about the fact that he was a better person for knowing Jillian. Can I get an AWWWWWWW?? That melted my heart! Seriously if I was Jill it would have been hard to stay on that couch and not jump up and plant a big wet one on his sweet face. Seriously he is a class act. Love Him!!! Here is my pitch - Pick him & his twin brother as the next Bachelor(s)! Now that would bring some kick ass ratings for Mike Fleiss (that's the producer for those who are lost right now). Come on you have to admit Michael would make for a memorable season.

6.  OK I don't like Ed but Drunk Ed totally cracked me up!  Drunk Ed on film made for some great laughs.  

7.  Reid is not a good hula dancer.  Totally adorable but I think if his life depended on it he couldn't dance his way out of a paper bag!

8.  The piece on Kiptyn's charity work made me like him ever more.  He for sure won points in my book.  Now that is the stuff they should have shown during the hometown date.  That was way more heartwarming that his crazy mama!!!

9.  OK we all know that Tanner P. loves feet a little too much but I cant help but like him.  

10.  OK two words for you "Man Code".  Seriously had I known they were gonna talk about this topic for as long as they did I could have made a drinking game out of it.  Imagine you take a shot for Juan every time someone says "Man Code".....you would have been as wasted as Jillian in the pepperoni clip.  Does everyone not agree that Angry Trucker Dave is completely off the reservation?   In my opinion "Man Code" is an just excuse to act like an asshat!  I mean really dude?!?!?Are you that far removed from society?  Seriously this ogre really didn't think he did anything wrong.  Was he raised in a damn barn?  I don't know...he just blew me away!?!?  I loved when Juan put him in his place and said "To me man code is being a gentleman & being an adult.  In my opinion getting drunk and belligerent, threatening people, and groping Jillian...that isn't being a man"  Amen BROTHER!!!  

On to why I call these guys dudes!!!!  This isn't how I talk, this is the reference they deserve.  These aren't men or guys...they are dudes.  Aside from Jake, Michael Stag, Tanner P. & Juan I would like to have known the combined IQ for the losers on this stage.  Seriously where did they come up with these guys.  I don't know why I didn't notice it before tonight!  Maybe I was too busy being pissed at Wes,  falling in love with Reid and looking at Kiptyns abs to see these dudes are complete douche bags  But boy oh boy did they show their true colors tonight!! Obviously it was slim pickins during this seasons selection process.  

NOW lets get to the preview for next week.  Um yeah did you watch???  Uh huh.....that's right.  Reid is coming back and with a ring :0)  I was so excited when I saw that!!!! I think I actually jumped up and down.  

But what am I not excited about seeing next week????  Ed in those damn shorts again!!!!

BTW the bloopers last night were priceless....best ones I have seen yet :)

What did you think?????